The frequent number of clicky, co-ed groups is due to a Latin cultural norm. In Latin societies as compared to Western societies, men play a greater role as the provider and protector. They are looked upon as the breadwinners and guardians of their women. This is because a large part of Latin society is still very machismo.
In a nightclub or bar setting, unknown men are considered threats to attractive females because they typically are drinking alcohol, at times consuming other types drugs. As a result, partying in co-ed groups is a manifestation of perceived danger rather than a reflection the women’s dating status. Trusted men in the group provide the women an enhanced level of security and they are not necessarily husbands or boyfriends.
Critics of my observations would counter, “Evan, I think you are wrong because I see girl only groups at night all the time.”
True, this is sometimes the case. Girl only groups are visible in Panama and other parts of Latin America. But, typically they fall into one of two categories:
Category 1: Cosmopolitan Types. Those independent minded women who disdain their machismo cultural legacy. They hate the fact that Latin culture still believes their place in society is in the kitchen rather than the workplace. I would disdain it too. More often than not, these women have spent time in parts of Europe and/or the States. If not, they probably watch to Cosmopolitan inspired shows like Grey’s Anatomy and Sex in the City. Cosmopolitan Types are frequently found at places like the Indigo, the Havana, the Prive, or the La Casona.
- Chat up the guys. This seems counter-intuitive, talking to guys when you want to meet girls? However, unlike Western countries where talking to a guy at a bar might provoke a fight, Latin guys are easy to approach. Latins are interested in people from other Western countries.
- Second. it is viewed as a favorable status symbol for Latin men to be rubbing elbows with Western guys. Avoid the possibility of being considered gay by telling a story about an ex-girlfriend or commenting on the attractiveness of a particular girl.
It is critical that you win over the guys. If they do not like you, or do not know you, you will be perceived as a threat. A threat to the group and a threat to the very women you want to meet. If they like you they are much less likely to cock-block you.
Once you have successful befriended the males, find out what the relationships are. This is vital because you have to know who is off limits; who is married to whom, or who is dating whom. More importantly, you will find out who is available: friends, cousins, co-workers. Afterwards, slowly proceed to initiate a conversation with the girl who originally attracted you over to the table. You are on your own from there.
- First. Put yourself in an approachable position. Instead of sitting in the middle of a group, sit at the end of a table. Some place that you are not surrounded by people flanked on either side.
- Second. Instead of making glancing eye contact, or even awkward prolonged eye contact, try this. Try making initial eye contact. Then look downward, and slowly raise your eyes upwards again. This second initiation of contact is a clear indication of interest. It’s pretty damn sexy. If the guy is not totally oblivious, then he should come over to chat.
- Third. Get out of your seat. Go to the bar and order some water, or even go to the bathroom several times. Just make sure you are moving around. This will increase your chances of “bumping” into someone. Moving around the club and meeting people is more exciting than stirring your drink over and over, judging the other girls at the bar, and pretending to “love to dance” all night.
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