Limited Spanish Dating

August 15, 2010 by: Evan Terry Forbes
Limited Spanish Dating

How to successfully understand Panama sex dynamic with limited Spanish.

Dating in a different language is difficult.  Both language and cultural differences exist.  At the beginning of a different language relationship, it’s a novelty.  Even, if your vocabulary is limited to a few basic phrases, it’s fun, it’s new, and a it is the best way to learn a language.

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Yet, as time wears on, the novelty wears off.  Your inability to communicate will become awkward and frustrating.  Communicating in another language is difficult for all but the most fluent.  Here are some basic tips that I hope will make your entry into the local dating scene less stressful and more rewarding.

First, remember the differences between men and women.  For females, attracting males with limited communication is easier. Simply stated, males are much more attracted to physical features.  On the other hand, females tend to place a higher importance on intellectual and emotional connections. To illustrate my point, look no further than the female display manikens with totally disproportionate double D breasts in Panama’s shopping malls.  The ability to verbally communicate with the woman you desire is critical to your successful dating experience.

Understanding the importance of communication, you can see the difficulty in dating when you have limited language skills.  This is not to discourage my fellow amigos.  However, it is crucial that you acknowledge the limits of your Spanish and adjust accordingly.  Pinpoint your level of Spanish and incorporate some of the tips below.
No Spanish (20 words or less)  – First and foremost, learn more Spanish!  If not, go to places where it is so LOUD it’s nearly impossible to talk (Beiginns, Hard Rock Café, People, Zona Viva).  Have good, positive energy and communicate with body language.

Your homework: Learn more Spanish!

Beginner (20 – 100 words).  Dancing and language tips.   Ask for help with Latino things like help with dancing Merenge (Salsa is too difficult, don’t even try) or how to say something in Spanish.  A little Latino tutelage will be considered cute.

Your homework:  Try to learn 5 new Spanish words a day and watch No Words Spanish video.  Start with phrase like; how do you say – “como se dice”, you look pretty –  ”te ves bien”, and the verb to dance – “bailar”. Additionally,  listen to 15 minutes of Salsa and Merenge to acclimate yourself to the beat.



Intermediate (100 – 300 words).  This is my current level of Spanish.  Don’t get too confident.  Avoid large groups of her friends until you are comfortable in the relationship.  I refer to it as choosing your battlefield.  With multiple native Spanish speakers, the conversation will be too fast.  Your silence will be taken as anti-social.  No bueno.

Additionally, learn the chorus to popular Latino songs.  Being able to sing along will be impressive for a foreigner.  Also, inject funny Panamanian slang terms and common phrases and have her explain the meaning to you.

Your homework:  Listen to songs that are popular in Panama.  Download all Marc Anthony and Calle 13 albums, learn a couple Panamanian slang terms, and common phrases.

Advanced (highly conversational).  At this level, speaking Spanish one on one or in group setting is not a problem.   A deeper understanding of both local Panamanian and broader Latino culture is in order.

Your homework:  Learn local political matters (read La Prensa), travel to frequented Panama destinations (Chiriqui, Carnivales in Los Santos, and Decameron), familiarize yourself with movies and TV shows (Chance and El Cartel de los Sapos), and the larger Latin culture outside of Panama (CNN en Espanol).

Most importantly, once you have reached an advanced level of Spanish, stop talking.  Be an active listener.  In economics it’s referred to as the 80- 20 rule.  It applies to dating too.   She talks 80% of the time and you speak the other 20%.

Be an interested attentive listener. Show her that you care and you’re more interested in her than merely sleeping with her. Having a shared connection is central to dating chemistry.  Good chemistry is the difference between a temporary fling and having an ongoing dating partner.

Above all, don’t ignore what you already know. An attractive Panamanian woman is not fundamentally different from a pretty woman back home. Good manners, not being creepy or socially awkward, and respect go a long way no matter where you are. Being in decent physical shape helps too.  The fact that you try to communicate with a woman with whom you do not share a language is already a point in your favor.  Most of the time, the effort will be recognized and appreciated.

Entering a totally new dating scene is never easy. When you don’t speak the language, your task is even more challenging. However, don’t be intimidated. You will have fun. You will learn.  If you are lucky, you might even meet that special dating partner.  Suerte Amigos!

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One Comment on "Limited Spanish Dating"

  1. Panamanian on Wed, 8th Sep 2010 12:13 pm 

    Well, some thoughts in this articule are so true! I have to say: a language barrier is not a limitation to meet people. Here in Panama you just have to enjoy your stay and have fun. A different culture by far, but always great is its way.

    I am produly Panamanian. Love my country!

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